Getting a New Jersey License

So today we (my wife and I) went to the New Jersey Motor Vehicle Commission for new licenses and new plates for our cars. It was just what you might expect from the Peoeple's Republic of New Jersey. I rather bland building with rather interesting people working there.

The fun begins upon entry when you are greeted and asked: "What services do you need?"

"Changing driver's license and registration" we state. We are handed a batch of forms in a variety of color and texture and with several colors of highlighting on it for you to enjoy filling out. Some are cards, some are paper, some are one-sided, others are double-sided. Many have surprisingly similar information both presented and requested although in subtly different ways. I can not determine if this is a test to determine if I can answer similar questions the same way, or in fact some trickery to help befuddle the masses and make it more fun for the employees to watch the people attempt to fill them out. We fill out all of the license and registration information and are told that we need titles for the cars in order to register them. Since we don't have these, we decide that this will be another trip for another day and continue on for licenses.

I find it interesting that New Jersey considers the DMV what you might expect, although I've never seen it in print: "Department of Motor Vehicles". They also at times refer to themselves as: NJMVC - New Jersey Motor Vehicle Commission. I was almost tempted to ask them to fill out some of the afforementioned identification forms to see how they filled each out. I guess there is a difference between a Department and a Commission, but I surely can't determine the difference. Based upon this I think it is somehow indicative of the level of corruption within your organization.

After filling out all of the forms we step into line to have our existing documentation checked. The differences between this review of documents and a border crossing at "Checkpoint Charlie", are few: no guns thankfully, no one shouting: "papers, I must see your papers." There is an interesting point system having to do with passports, other licenses, primary and secondary documents. The people behind table A, flip through documents staring alternately between the documents and us, finally due to a preponderance of evidence (suffice to say we presented a bushel of paperwork) we exceed the criteria required to prove we are who we say. Having this documentation checked at one table isn't sufficient however, there is another table a scant six feet away at which the person at table A, must personally walk your documents over (presumable to prevent tampering during the long journey) to the person at table B, and they must be re-validated.

At this juncture we realize that we have accidentally left the checkbook at home and are cashless. This is bad for us as there is a sign written in bright green marker stating: "No Credit or Debit Cards, Cash or Check Only", interestingly there are indeed several of these, some of which also claim: "Please put your DL# and Ph# on your check", which is simply silly I think - I don't have a "DL#" until such time that you give me one now do I? This seems like an almost amazing transaction - and I will in fact participate in it a short time later as you will learn.

We leave the NJMVC, or DMV (whatever they are being called) and head for home. Fortunately for us it turns out that while there are a few of these places around, some more convenient for some than others this place is only a few miles away. So we go home, grab the checkbook and titles for the cars and head back.

We enter the door and are shuttled again to table A for validation of our "Papers". Table A gives us a clean slate, and moves us to table B. The new person at table B is puzzled that in fact the "Papers" seem to have the marks of a former occupant of her position. She inquires to this and the person from table A, fortunately, explains the checkbook scenario of 10 short minutes ago and we are allowed to pass to the next helpful person in the process.

We are now entering the photo taking stage of the adventure. The person behind the counter in line 5 (somehow lines have numbers whereas tables have letters) takes all of our information and reviews it a third time, not only to ensure that the first two have made their marks on our documents, but also to peruse the original papers (for what I have no idea but she does it). She clickity clacks on the keyboard and tells me to step back for my picture. I do so, noting that my shirt is a very similar blue to the background and I am likely to not have a torso. She fixes this problem by zooming in on my head. Giving me a DL-photo not remarkably different from a casaba melon. My wife gets her turn and has a photo more like one would expect, a bust shot, approximately 6-8 inches of shoulders and neck, and her face.

We pay our fee for our permit which permits us to walk to the other side of the office and stand in line for our test. We then proceed to get an eye test, what this test tells them about my ability to see road-hazards, cars, lights, people, dogs and wayward baby carriages I don't know. I pronounce a series of visible letter and am pronounced good-to-go. My wife actually had trouble with the eye test, but eventually passed and moved on.

After passing the ever difficult eye test we moved back to the permit location, only this time we were about to be officially licensed. We once again handed our paperwork back to the permit lady and she took the information, validated the information was correct, asked us if we were OK with our pictures (I decided even though I wasn't I would simply live with it), who really cares what they look like on a DL-photo anyway.

We now get to the fun part of taking numbers from someone, scribing them onto a piece of paper (in the form of a check) and handing them back to the person from whence they came. The young lady behind the counter handed us papers with our driver's license numbers on them, we then copied them onto our checks, as the sign said: "Please place DL# on your check", we then handed the check back to the lady behind the counter. I just couldn't shake the sense that this particular action was exceedingly odd. I couldn't tell if it was meant to be a reading test, to prove that I could read the numbers they had given me or what. This is very similar to Mr. Hayden's phrase about reading something somewhere: "I wrote it down, then I read it". I just kept thinking I've come with 6-points worth of identification (whatever it is that means exactly), and the item they want me to present to them is the number they are just gave me. Fortunately, except for now as I type this I mostly stopped thinking about it, mostly to save myself a headache.

Now we move on to the registration portion of the festivities. This is tedious but rather uneventful. The lady at line 3 I think it was takes several documents from us, plus some documents from her dear friend in line number 5, processes several more documents. Creates a few more, grabs some license plates, folds some of our documents , places them all in plastic bags, and once again asks for a check with the numbers that the lady from line 5 gave to me written on it somewhere.

We leave approximately one hour later, somehow unbloodied yet strangely changed for our encounter.

Home Audio

Well I finally installed home theater sound (Bose's Acoustimass 10) in the new house. In the old house I had my receiver plugged into my old speakers, some old Sony model that were pretty good. I had tried out a Bose VCS-10 center channel speaker but didn't really like the quality so I had returned it. Scott Hayden of Hayden's Harangues is very anti-Bose so I wasn't sure if I could risk his ire and purchase. I had been waffling on whether or not to hire someone to go fully built-in or try running some cabling myself, or try for wireless rear speakers, which are just starting to come around for installations under 100w/channel. I had been looking at orbaudio.com, and their speakers looked cool, but I really wanted to hear something before purchasing. After thinking and searching and calling people for a while we decided to take a jaunt out to see/hear some stuff. We went to Circuit City, which is now another chain I will likely NOT go to much any longer, and spent about 30 minutes or so playing in their speaker room. They had a really cool digital system that lets you switch between various setups. The problem was that it took a few minutes to switch between setups so it was hard to get a full swap completed in a timely fashion to really compare speakers. I looked at some taller Sony speakers, as they were a bit cheaper and I thought I may be able to get away without a subwoofer, as I didn't have one before and it seemed fine to me. I was flipping between Sony and Polk and Infinity, avoiding the Bose due to bias from Hayden. I asked someone to find me a sales rep and they paged to no avail, so I went back to testing on my own. At one juncture I hit a setting that put the rear Bose speakers on and they sounded much better. I tried to flip between Infinity and Bose as I had then decided on smaller rather than larger. A few more minutes of playing around with the speakers and finally some young kid arrived and I explained to him what I wanted to test. He put on all of the Bose equipment and cranked the thing up to -15db. I walked over and lowered it as I wanted to hear fidelity now loudness. I tried to switch to the Infinity speakers and completed the setup and he once again cranked it up. I once again walked over and lowered it. I explained to him that I wanted to quickly flip back and forth as the machine was designed to do. I showed him that Setup A was close to what I wanted and I wanted Setup B and A to flip back and forth. He said: "I don't know how to do that." What he didn't say was: "All I know how to do is make it loud!". I decided I had had enough tomfoolery and walked out of the store. I was somewhat please with the sound of the Bose and since there was a factory outlet close to our new house we went there. I played with the Acoustimass 6, 10, and 15 for a little while, then summoned a sales rep. I explained my setup at home and he suggested the 10. The 15 supports 6.1 as does my receiver but I don't have anyplace for the center back, so I just skipped it. Much nicer service - no attempted upcharging for "MONSTER CABLES - OH YOU GOTTA HAVE MONSTER CABLES THEY ARE JUST THE GREATEST THING EVER, OHHH, OOOOOH" - sorry I slipped into my Sam Kinison voice for a minute there. No upcharging on service programs, just gave me the stuff I wanted, offered factory renewed instead of brand new and in less than 15 minutes in a very casual way I had what I wanted. Hooking them up was a little different than I had anticipated - receiver hooks to the Acoustimaass thing, then the speakers hook to that. Kind of interesting, but generates good sound quality and I can't go above -30db without being told to turn it down. I also managed to run the cables into the basement and back up the back so I can have it on whenever I want - no more dragging cables around like I had to do back in Pittsburgh.

The House

Well, we're finally in the new house more pictures - it has now been 5 weeks since we closed. The good news is that with all of the potentials for serious debacle we ended up with a fairly nice new house built by Centex Homes, in a decent neighborhood (Howell, NJ) and things are going ok. Thankfully Kara Homes let us out of our contract when they were unable to start work on our originally planned house. The timeline of the transactions went something like this: - September 17th - Give a downpayment to Kara Homes - About a week or so later - Give a much larger amount of money to Kara - About a month or so later - Give even more money to Kara - No activity through October, November or December on a house that was originally going to be delivered by the end of January December 21st - PANIC - begin looking for something as we are selling our home in Pittsburgh and it is set to close on January 14th. We called Newhomes.com I called a number and there was no answer so I didn't leave a message. About 3 minutes later my phone rang and it was Sandy Lefkowitz from newhomes.com - he was standing in the delivery room waiting for his grandchildren (twins) to be born, and told me he would have someone call me right away. Within 2 hours Tom Burdett (not the comedian) called me back and I explained my desire to find a house as quickly as possible. He took down some of my requirements and began a search. He called me back and had found a house in Marlboro, NJ that looked to be ok. We packed up the family and on December 23rd drove from Pittsburgh to NJ to look at the house. Unfortunately it was not what we had hoped. The property was very tight and constricted, and the houses around it were on top of each other, so we headed back to Pittsburgh very unhappy. Tom had found another place for us to potentially purchase but we wereheading off to vacation to spend New Year's with Mickey in DisneyWorld (the plans had been made before we even knew we were moving). While we were in Disney Kara called and stated that they had received notice from thetownship that they could not continue building or start any new houses, ours being one of them, and they would be having a meeting to discuss all of the details with all of the homebuilders. In the meanwhile we were still in Florida and it was looking less likely that we would have a place to live come Jan 14. I decided to end vacation early and head up to New Jersey on Sunday Jan 2 to see the house. When I walked in the house looked pretty good and a took about 70 pictures and emailed them to my wife. I gave the builder some hand money and said we would buy it. Now we had to get our money back from Kara. All the while we had been speaking to Kara we had been cautious to not set a bad tone as they had essentially our life savings in their account. We called Kara and stated that we simply wanted our money back and would move on with our lives. After a few phones calls with a few different people and assurances from methat all I wanted was my money - no blood, no foul - I'd walk away with a handshake, a kiss on the cheek and that was it, they decided that it was fine and agreed to give me the money back. On Jan 13 the moving company came and packed up the house and drove away with all of our belongings. We closed on the house in Pittsburgh on Jan 14 and moved in to the Marriott Suites. A harrowing two weeks to be sure. While attempting to secure funding for this new purchase the appraisal forthe house came in below the asking price. Centex wanted to keep the price where it was and while I wasn't ecstatic at paying above appraised value, but I was stuck without a place to live. I made an offer that was above the appraisal, below the asking price and still left me money for a McDonald's happy meal at the end of the day. They accepted this offer and on Jan 23 I drove my older daughter's car to New Jersey. On Jan 27 my wife obtained a large cashier's check from the bank and headed to New Jersey with my younger daughter to live. On Jan 28 we closed on the new house in New Jersey and on Jan 29 the mover's brought all of our stuff to the new house. Whew - that felt like quite an event. Next: furnishing this thing

Comp USA has Miserable service.

I ordered a very simple item - a wireless microsoft mouse in groovy color. The Internet order system claimed it was in stock and available. Unfortunately this turned out to be false. Contained below are a few excerpts (jazzed up with bold and italics and bold-italics for effect) from a letter I just sent to their customer service department - we shall see what happens.

__________________________________________

I entered the store - there was one or two people in line. I had forgotten my sales receipt so the sales person went to the store room to check if my item had been selected. He did not find anything under my name in the stock room, so he called another person to the front to ask for assistance. This person stated - "Oh, I don't think we have that in that color". Which I immediately thought odd as the Internet listed it as in stock. This new person, wearing pants barely remaining on, walked towards the back. I watched as he turned into a particular aisle - becoming concerned that this Internet Pickup process was clearly broken - I followed him to see if what I was seeking was present. He had apparently been distracted and was doing something else entirely so I walked directly out of the store. On the way home I called the store and was routed through the voice mail system 4 times (pressing zero, waiting 6 or more rings then back to voice mail, pressing zero, etc.) before finally having a person answer the phone. I requested to speak to a manager and was placed on hold. After a few minutes someone picked up that claimed to be the sales manager. I began to explain the situation and my unhappiness with the Internet pickup process. He stated that "Well it usually helps" to which I said in an elevated tone: "AHA - usually helps, is a far cry from works!", to which he replied: "Don't raise your voice or I'll hang up on you", I beat him to the button and hung up on him after stating abruptly: "Goodbye!" I assure you I will NEVER again even remotely consider CompUSA for a purchase - which is quite unfortunate as my last computer purchase was from your store in Monroeville, PA.

The following improvements were noted - hey I'm a consultant and offer process improvement as part of my job - they're getting free service here.

Perhaps some modecum of training in proper customer service would enable you to keep customers.

Perhaps a usable inventory system - controlled by perhaps a "computer" would enable items ordered and listed as "in stock" to be "in stock".

Perhaps looking on the "computer" would have enabled the first sales person to have told me the item wasn't in stock instead of checking the store room.

The Blue Marble

While wandering the web this morning I found this site. It has a lot of very interesting images of earth from space. Haven't done a lot of looking yet.

Scientific American is a great magazine

Just wanted to compliment the folks at Scientific American for a great magazine. I was recently on a flight from MCO-EWR. I needed to do a few minutes of computer work, but each article was interesting and well written. I really like the detail that they provided even though some of it was over my head. I was sorry to have the flight end, it was an airline copy so I couldn't keep it.

Livestrong - Sure you should, but Lance Armstrong is a jerk

So USA today did a piece on tjhe pop icons of the year. One of which included the Livestrong bands from Lance Armstrong. Several reasons to hatethese little rubber bracelets.

1. Lance Armstrong is a jerk, he left hiswife when he obtained his new fame to chase Sheryl Crow.
2. So you gave$1 to cancer. Less the manufacturing cost and distribution cost they got 65 cents maybe 90, whatever - why not just spring for a whopping $10 and send it direct, oops then you wouldn't be able to say "I gave a dollar, I gave a dollar...."
3. Lance Armstrong is a self absorbed moron - oh I said that, well it warrants saying again.
4. Hey look stupid - it looks likeyou had a rubberband (gumband if your from Pittsburgh) wrapped around youhand and forgot to take it off.
5. Just to feed off Hayden's Harangues - it make you look like a lemming.

Home Building, er buying

Ok so now I need to have a meeting with the home builder I originally selected. I think he is about to tell me he can't build. I am hopeful that I get all of my money back. Stay tuned.

Amazon.com is annoying

I hate how amazon now has used stuff and auction nonsense, it irrirtates me no end. If I want used garbage I'll go to eBay. For this reason I no longer buy stuff from them.

The Boondocks

I find this comic strip amusing. While many will say that it is radically left wing, I think it does an elegant dance between left and right and pokes fun at a great many things, from DVD encryption patents to Kwanzaa, which is his current target.

Still no movement on "The House"

Well it is now Christmas - or at least 20 minutes till. We still have made no progress towards a house. The political machinery that is New Jersey has sent the sceptic and other permits (I know not what) back to the builder three times now. I think this is officially a debacle. I will continue to post as things move (or not) forward with this adventure.

A Christmas Story

Once again it is time for the annual 24 hours of "A Christmas Story". The wonderful tale which has Peter Billingsley playing Ralphie in a quest for a Red Ryder BB Gun. I am trying to find copies of the Warner Brothers cartoon which has Ralph Phillips as a daydreaming child. This movie is very similar in style to that, and I think (although I have been unable to validate) that in fact Ralph's teach in the cartoons in Ms. Shields. The same teacher's name in the movie. I think it is eminently possible that in fact they borrowed much from the cartoons. Does anyone out there have an opinion?

Why I hate Tommy Hilfiger

This is just a simple little rant. I don't hate Tommy Hilfiger for all the reasons a lot of others do. Not because he makes average clothes and sells them at higher than necessary prices. I'm sure that there's an entire rant that others can add. My main reason is buttons. What is it with Hilfiger and buttons? I have several shirts of his, both golf type and dress type. Why is it that they must make some of the button holes in a different direction. I have told my wife to not purchase any more of these.

Jury Recommends Execution for Peterson

Well this is finally over - Yahoo Story now we'll have to move on to the next big trial. Personally given the facts portrayed to the public it seems like he was the likely perpetrator. I know that Mr. Hayden will disagree with the sentence being vehemently anti-death penalty, but I think this case justifies it, as does Susan Smith (not sure how she managed her sentence downward).

Cryptography Rant

I am beginning a new debate, primarily with myself although others may and have commented. My new position is that all things crypto are fully and simply a method of Identity and Access Management. I say this because the goal of encryption is to ensure or enforce that only specific people or individuals (identity) can read or modify (access) data that is encrypted. It is therefore simply a mechanism - albeit mathematical in its basis - a mechanism to enforce access control. If we think back to the early days of encryption the goal was to protect information from being accessed by the enemy and ensure that only valid recipients received the information. One of the more famous used of encryption was The Enigma Machine the goal of which was to protect German messages from the read by the Allies. Fortunately we were able to crack the code and decipher (access) the data.

Home Building

Well I'm about to move to New Jersey. We are going to build a new house. It is currently untouched ground, it shouldn't be but is. Watch this space to see the process progress.

First Public Blog Entry

My First Blog EntryI have experience with this type of stuff although not with this technology. When I first started running the BMW 7 Series Web Site. I had Bresz Musings, a collection of random thoughts I was thinking at the time. I'm going to slowly migrate them into this form for public consumption and public management.

Baseball

This week I delve into areas outside the pursuit of speed and BMWs. I venture into America's national pastime: baseball. For those of you who have been spending time on some other planet this summer, Mark McGwire of the Cardinals has been chasing Roger Marris' single season home run mark of 61. The race has been on essentially since the end of spring training. Last night he hit number 62, a screaming line drive just over the wall in left field. I think he'll crtank a few extra just for good measure. This was one of the longest standing records in baseball. Joltin' Joe Dimaggio's consecutive game hitting streak is one of the few remaining major records that has been with us longer. I have always been a big baseball fan. It isn't that I don't like other sports, it's just that there is something special about baseball. I grew up in Brooklyn, many will tell you that New York is clearly where my personality comes from, but that's an entirely different story. My mom was a huge Brooklyn Dodgers fan, they left the big apple in '57 to head west with the the Giants. Having a deep hatred for the Yankees it was simply not possible to switch allegiances simply because your team had left town, and the Yankees were the only major league team left in town. There were five dry years of no national league representation for New York then along came the Mets. They were housed originally in the Polo grounds left vacant by the Giants, but they were a national league team and that was good enough. I didn't get to see the first season, appearing on this earth in November of '62 I missed what some say was the most embarrassing season of all time. For the first few years they of course floundered. Then came the Miracle Mets of '69. Honestly, I don't really remember the series first hand, but for all of the early 70's I saw this series against the Orioles played again and again during every rain delay. The first series I can remember watching was when they did battle with the Big Red Machine for the National League Championship in '72, which they lost.

The baseball season is, to me, more genteel, more relaxing, yet all the while maintaining an excitement and anticipation unmatched by other sports. The season is contained from beginning to end in a single year. When you say the Mets were the World Champions in 1969. You don't have to think: "is that when the final game was played, or is that when the majority of the season was played". There is a warmth that you can feel when you think of baseball. The game is meant to be played on warm summer afternoons and in the blazing sunshine. Today there are of course night games, which give more people the opportunity to watch, but who among us can deny having pondered the thought of sneaking away from work to catch an afternoon game at the ballyard. No other sport offers the opportunity to take a break from the work day like baseball. Baseball was the last major sport to give in to the concept of a wild-card, before this the World Champion in baseball was guaranteed to be one of the four teams that stood atop their division at the end of the regular season. Unlike sports such as hockey, where they play an 80 game regular season, and then as many as 26 more games to crown a winner. This champion can easily complete the season in as low as third or fourth place, march through the playoffs and take the title. Unfortunately we have now added the wild-card to our hallowed sport, and with all of the playoffs we now often see cold weather before the World Series can even begin. In my opinion taking just a little bit away.

More so than in any other sport, the moments: the game ending strikeouts, the game winning home runs, the final play always seem to stick in our minds. The moments seem to be forever frozen in time. Carlton Fisk, waving his home run into fair territory in the World Series. Tom Seaver mowing down batters on his way to 19 in one game. Darryl Strawberry hitting the ball out of the park and now there is Mark McGwire.

Who can watch The Natural and not remember the light shattering home run. Who can not remember the line: "I want people say: 'There goes Roy Hobbes, the best there ever was'". Baseball has a heritage, a heritage which is preserved when we see Ken Griffey Jr. surpass the exploits of his father. Baseball provides the dream. Sons will continue to follow their fathers, and young boys will continue to surpass their heroes as they work their way through the minors to one day make it into the show.

P.S. This is really from 1998 but the post factory won't handle 1998.

Speeding

Speeding - Right or wrong we all do it. Being owners of BMW 7 Series machines, we all know that these cars are designed and built to cruise on the autobahn, not sputter along at 55MPH or 65MPH here in the states. The BMW 7 Series has recently been rev limited to 128MPH. In the days before 1994 (I think that is when the change happened) it was limited to 155MPH. I am not exactly sure where or how these limits are determined, but they seem arbitrary. Personally, I have done some rough calculations and by tachometer and redline ratios I have calculated the 1992 750iL could in theory get to 180MPH. When crusing at 90MPH the tach is at exactly 3,000 so with a 6,000RPM redline I should get to 180MPH. It may have trouble with wind resistance, since it is not a straight linear equation, and while somewhat aerodynamic, I think we all have to admit that the big sedan is not quite a slippery eel through the air. So, with all that for background I think it is safe to say that most of us do not always obey the posted speed limits. One additional note on the big-7, remember to be appreciative of your 7 Series for one feature in particular. Our big sedans, typically in non-flashy colors, do not stand out as prime targets like our brethren in the Cop-Catcher Red M3s, Mustangs and Camaros, even though we all know we are more than a match for these mighty mites, especially when we actually have to shift into high gear somewhere in the neighborhood of 120MPH or so. I will say that I do have a tendency to exceed, click here to read about some of my escapades. If you are planning to spend time above the limit, buy a radar detector. I don't want to speak for particular models, however I have heard nothing but good things about Valentine One detectors, I personally own a Whistler-880, it has saved me from a few scrapes. Please do be aware that there are several states where they are illegal, Virginia is amongst them. I know people who have been stopped for having them, if you think the police can't detect your detector you are wrong. I don't know very much about laser, other than it is not yet approved for use in Pennsylvania. Here are some general rules I like to follow. We've all heard it said but it really is true, don't be the fastest car on the road. I have been on the road on several occasions when people that have passed me have been pulled over while I drove on by. Be aware of your surroundings, this is actually a good thing even if you aren't speeding, but watch the on-ramps, bends and rises, police are notorious for hanging out just out of sight. Don't just camp in the left lane and push people out of the way, change lanes occasionally and let others pass. Since one of my incidents mentioned above involved an off duty I am always careful when I see cars too close behind me or gaining too quickly. I simply pull over and let them by. Watch the tail lights in front of you, they can indicate a predator ahead. I personally used this technique to impress my father-in-law during one recent outing to a NASCAR event. We were coming home late and it was quite dark. I had the radar detector on, but had only gotten a whisper of signal as I descended a long hill. I looked up the other side of the hill and I noticed that just as all of the cars reached the top of the hill they were braking. Now, why would they brake just as they reached the top of the hill, of course there was a patrol car there. I slowed to the speed limit as I climbed the hill and rolled past him nice and legal. My father-in-law asked, "How did you know he was there, the detector went off so long ago". I said: "Because every car hit the brakes as they reached the top of the hill". Basic rule, if you can see no brake lights for one half mile or more there probably aren't any police between you and the lead car. It's simply human nature, see a cop, hit the brakes, even if you are doing the legal limit. Another rule I follow is to know the roads I travel, I can tell you to the yard where the cops between my office and my house are likely to be. Sure, they move around a little but they have set places and simply go there. I watched a guy get pulled over in front of me because he was silly enough to go whizzing past the state police barracks at 75+ in a 55 zone. We had been tooling along at 85 or so, and as we approached the barracks I slowed and pulled into the right lane, he continued on and rolled right through the speed trap, what a knuckle-head. Most importantly, again as evident by the item referenced above, if you do get stopped do not argue with the police. My dad was a New York City patrolman, he always told me that nothing irritated him more than people arguing with him. I have talked my way out of several tickets. Rule one when addressing an officer, "Yes, sir/ma'am", "No sir/ma'am", go a long way towards showing your respect for their authority. If you truly feel you are being unduly ticketed, save it for the judge, you simply are not going to win an argument with an officer of the law on the highway, it simply doesn't happen. In the book "A Speeder's Guide to Avoiding Tickets" (I highly recommend this book, it is informative and a good read) James Eagan states that one of the officer's primary goals is to ensure safety, yours as well as theirs. If you quickly begin to argue with them, and make them feel as though they are unsure of what you might do, they are very defensive. When the police are defensive they aren't listening to whatever it is you are saying, they are watching you closely to ensure you don't make any threathening moves, so your words are simply going into the air, save your breath. Speak load enough to be heard but don't shout, just talk. On one particular occasion I was stopped for speeding, after pulling me over the officer said: "You were going a little fast for the neighborhood weren't you sir?" I said: "I'm sorry officer I probably was going faster than I should have been, I was a little lost, and I was talking on the phone trying to get directions and probably was not watching my speed as much as I should have been." Now that sounds like a ticket for sure, nope, just a warning. I had showed him respect, made it clear I knew he was right and I was wrong. Sure, I had to swallow my pride for a little while, but my wallet felt great afterwards. P.S. This is really from 1998 but the post factory won't handle 1998.

Why a BMW 7 Series?

Why did I purchase a BMW 750iL? Well it all started back in late 1984, I worked for a then small company named FORE Systems, I started when they where small and picked up some stock before IPO. When they went public it turned out I had a little bit of extra cash. I decided I wanted a car in the $30-40k range. I looked at virtually everything out there. First up an Acura Legend, I took it for a nice spin, it was certainly room enough, and handled all right, but I wasn't sure I was ready for a Japanese car. I knew that the BMW 525i was about the price I wanted, and I knew that I would have to drive a BMW before I made any decision. The sales droid was convinced that the Legend could hold value just like a BMW, I was not as convinced. Next up an Infiniti J30, definitely a tighter machine than an Acura but still Japanese, need to test the Germans and Swedes and see what they had to offer. Mercedes was out, too boxy for me. So we gave the Audi a shot. Took the whole family, piled into an A6 and gave the salesman a ride. I wasn't sure of exactly where I was driving, but I was pushing a bit, not too much. Testing acceleration and braking in and out of the curves, which are plentiful here in Western Pennsylvania. I came up over a hill and realized I was in a parking lot behind some office buildings, it was a Saturday afternoon, and the parking lot was empty. The sales critter said: "Just make a lane over just to the edge by the guard rail." I figured, good deal, let's see how close we can get and turn hard left just as we get there. I planted my right foot and shot ahead towards the guard rail, got within a few feet and turned hard left. Judged it perfect, probably two feet from scraping, I think it looked a lot closer from his vantage point. He held tight to the dash, and said to my wife: "I think he really wants a Porsche." Porsche was out of the question I need to pile in 2 kids and the wife along with luggage and be able to hit the road. The car was nice but I needed to drive some more. Driving home one afternoon in a mild snow I decided this was the weather to try out the Saab 900. They always claimed to go well in the snow, so I stopped by a nearby dealer and took one out. It was good, it handled well, even in the snow, but I just didn't like the acceleration. It wasn't slipping it just wasn't jumping, I don't remember the precise model, but I had soured on Saab. All that was left in my mind was the BMW, I had saved it for last figuring it would definitely live up to my expectations. Unfortunately the 525i, as some of you may know is a bit under powered, and I could feel it. Also the sales person was not exactly friendly, sort of had the attitude that I shouldn't be wasting her time, I clearly wasn't going to buy a car from her. I left the dealer sorely dissatisfied on several counts. So now I had a decision to make, what to do, what to do? Then I thought, hey I've been looking at imports, maybe, just maybe, a domestic could fit the bill. What looked nice, a Pontiac Bonneville SSEI, I knew that they could perform, or so they said, I figured I would give it a shot. Wow, talk about excitement, it scared the living daylights out of me. I put it into the paces, and talk about body roll. I pulled out of a light and tromped the accelerator, amazing amount of torque steer, I thought I was going off the road. I told the salesman, thanks but no thanks, I just didn't like the car. Then, it appeared, coming out of work one day I spotted a very sharp looking BMW looking right at me as I came out of work. I looked carefully, as I sat at the light, I thought to myself, that is very wide, it can't be 5-series. So, I drove straight into the lot and began to check it out. I noticed the badge, 750iL, yes V-12, I know this baby will go, twice the engine of the little 525i. Nice and big, lot's of room, I had to drive this car. I called the wife and said: "I am looking at a BMW 750iL, if the price is right I am buying this car, it is really nice." Sales guy wandered out said: "Want to go for a drive?" "Yes!", was my immediate answer, he wandered off and collected some keys. We piled in and looked at the controls, lots of stuff going on in this cockpit. He wasn't sure of everything himself, it was a Cadillac dealer, they had taken the car on trade. I could not even fathom such a thing, someone trading a BMW for a Caddy, but it was my luck. Took it for a spin, mistakenly clicked M on the transmission and had it in drive, darn it didn't accelerate, disappointed again, then I looked at the dash and said: "Oops, we don't want that", I clicked the A, and stepped down. What fun, downshifted hard and away we went, this car handled exactly as I had imagined. Even though I had made the statement to my wife, I had to think about it. So I went home and pondered the big BMW. The next day I had a seminar to attend so I couldn't talk to the dealer, I called the dealer at around 4, after the seminar ended and said: "I'm on my way to look at the BMW!". Then he said some horrible words: "Sorry, some guy put money on it this morning.". Shoot, I was going to miss out, I had convinced my wife that she could take a quick look then we would buy it. Convinced her we could afford it, and everything. Oh well, it was not to be, kay-sera-sera. One day later, I was sitting in my office hacking away, and I received a call, it was the dealer. The guy's financing had fallen through and he couldn't get the car, if I wanted it I should come down. Over lunch I drove over, there was already a woman talking to the sales manager about the car. First one to put money on the car would get it, what could I do, last conversation with my wife was no car, let's use the money for something else. She was out and I didn't want to make a decision like this without at least consulting her. I just couldn't decide, so the woman put money on the car and I left. Next day, yet another day, yet another seminar, life was good back then, in the afternoon around 2 I checked my voice mail and there was a message from the dealer. The woman's husband said she couldn't buy, the car was available again. I didn't have any cash on me, how could I call him. I transferred to the company receptionist and asked her to transfer me to the car dealer. I gave him my credit card number to hold the car, and high tailed it up to his place as soon as the seminar was over. I walked in and said: "Hi Art, I'm here to take a final look at the BMW, what time are you here until, I want to bring my wife up." We lived about 45 minutes from the dealer, so I would have to drive home pick her up and drive back. Art said: "Here take it and let her see, then you can really test it." This was great no sales guy, I could really test. I couldn't believe it they just handed me the keys, I left my Chevy Lumina, fully 1/3 the value of the BMW and off I went. I pulled into the driveway and said: "Well, what do you think?" At the time we had the aforementioned Lumina and a Dodge Spirit, this car was just a few classes above those, so it was clearly a "Wow, this is really nice!". There was an import car mechanic around the corner, I didn't know him to this point, I called and asked if he could inspect a car and let me know what he thought. He would, so I drove over. He took it for a quick ride, put it up on the lift, spotted a leak in the left rear levelling shock, and that the brakes were a lttle thin up front, other than that he pronounced the car sound. I returned to the dealer and said: "Let's do it." That was a Thursday, I gave them my social security number and they did all of the paper work. They had the car ready for Saturday morning, fully detailed and looking immaculate. We drove up in the Chevy and my the trade way up in performance and style to the BMW 750iL. It had 45K on the clock, since then I've reached 110K. Overall I've probably spent the full retail cost of that Lumina on repairs and add-ons, but I love it. So ultimately the choice came down to brand new mid-range, or slightly used top of the line world class luxury sedan, I think I made the right choice don't you? P.S. This is really from 1998 but the post factory won't handle 1998.